I don't know!

Ghosts of the past beckon me,
No matter how hard I try.. they don't seem to let me go..
I don't know what I want from life and I don't know where would I go..
But the ghosts, they torture, they torment..
May be I should learn from they..
May be I should let them go...
Sometimes I try leaving them behind and try to love and feel loved..
But the heart still pains and it still hasn't learned how to love...
For me , the lane is one way either I can love too much or I cannot at all..
Cannot stand on two boats on the same time...
The magical three words of love come out with a lot of devotion and strength,
But then you unexpected response, which the ghosts warned about leaves me hurt again...
Every time life gives me a chance to move on, the ghosts don't let me venture..
Sometimes I wonder if they are ghosts... sometimes I feel they are my well-wishers ..
Not letting me feel hurt again..
Rather not do.. then do and feel hurt!!

You're busy when it comes to me,
But reply to every body else..
It's status reporting when you need to tell something to me,
Others know stuff before I can!
Cards and flowers mean nothing to you,
When I give them you make fun of them..
Do I then follow the ghosts and not get them for you
Or do I follow my heart and still do the things I love to do for you?
Why am I hurt each time you react unexpectedly..
Why do I react unexpectedly when you don't hurt..
Am I too used to the hurt?
Are you taking me for granted?
I don't know!